The world and especially our own minds demand so much from us that it can be extremely challenging to slow down and listen. One of the ways I support my physiology in slowing down is to notice that there is already a quiet and attentive presence here in every moment. We don’t have to force our traumatized minds and bodies into abeyance to notice the silent background of our existence. It’s here right now.
If it’s difficult to notice this silent presence I’m pointing towards; try noticing the presence of a tree, the sky or a mountain. Just look and for a moment allow your physiology to attune. Notice that in the same way you are present to the tree, sky or mountain, they are also present to you mirroring your quiet nature right back to you.
I’m very practice oriented in my work. After decades of reading and listening to spiritual concepts that didn’t mirror my experience I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t settle for anything less than trusting my own direct experience. For that reason I am continually pointing to experience as having the final say on what is true. Words can point, even these words, but your own experience is what really matters.
Those of us who experienced childhood trauma learned very early to distrust and hide our direct experience. We survived by splitting off from our direct experience.
When I write or speak the words, we survived by splitting off from our direct experience, I have to take a pause to allow my physiology to experience the enormity of that phrase. The loss. Words, especially when true, can evoke a strong response from the physiology. You might have noticed that as well and if you did take a moment to bring your hand to your heart in gentle acknowledgement of what was evoked in you. Your physiology is intelligent and gives reliable feedback when it comes to the heart.
“Find the sweetness in your own heart, then you may find the sweetness in every heart.” ~ Rumi
This simple movement of hand to heart is an acknowledgement of all the undigested pain and trauma your body is holding. I heard these words in a dream last night; I wish we could all stop acting as if we don’t have PTSD. Yes you heard that right: I wish we could all stop acting as if we don’t have PTSD. It’s an epidemic of pretending.
Now that I have you here with your hand connected to your heart I hope you will take a moment to whisper a few sweet words of acknowledgement to your physiology for all that it has endured. A little pause; a little contact and simple words of reassurance is one of the practices I teach and you can do that right now. My favourite words of reassurance are, “I’ve got you” or you may have some of your own favourites.
I would love to hear from you. What sweet words of reassurance do you speak to your body/nervous system when you feel activated and distant from yourself?
As a gift to your nervous system I invite you to join me for my Free Online Weekly Gathering: A Resting Place
“One of the most simple and beautiful practices I have ever been privileged to participate in.” ~ Participant
Love,
Candace
All of Candace’s services are Trauma, PTSD, Complex Grief, Chronic Illness and Benzo withdrawal symptom sensitive.